Congratulations! You are having a baby! Like many moms, you probably can’t wait to make the baby announcement and tell the world your happy news. BUT wait, your doctor just asked you to wait 12 weeks before telling anyone.
The 12-week rule is a long-standing recommendation and practice among OB GYNs. The recommendation stems from one major fact about pregnancy, and that is: statistically, miscarriages are more likely to happen in the first trimester.
Your first ultrasound can be incredibly exciting, but might not be the time to make the announcement.
Statistical estimates tell us that 1 out of every four pregnancies will end in a miscarriage, and 85% of those are more likely to happen in the first twelve weeks. Because of this, most OB GYNs will advise not to make the baby announcement until the trimester has passed in order to save the couple from an awkward conversation about having miscarried.
Another major fact about pregnancy that supports the 12-week rule is that some prenatal tests occur in the second trimester. Should genetic abnormalities be found, not having made the baby announcement still gives the couple the chance to decide if they will push through with the pregnancy or time to process and decide how to reveal that they are expecting a special child.
Other women, however, feel that the rule of 12 weeks is archaic or part of an old system of thinking that asks mothers to be perfect vessels for their children. A growing number of women believe in announcing early, and should they miscarry to announce the same. Miscarriages and genetic abnormalities are part of the process of having a baby. Why hide something that is just as much a part of nature as giving birth itself?
As blogger, Sophia Cachia, wrote in her blog The Young Mummy, “Can’t we as women have control over our bodies and thus make our own decisions? One in four pregnancies end in miscarriage… I think it’s a huge problem that society makes some women feel like they have to keep their pregnancies and their miscarriages hidden away.”
There are benefits, of course, to announcing early. One easy one is that you won’t have to lie or fake your symptoms (if you have morning sickness), and another is you can get the emotional support you might need from family, friends, and colleagues. The latter being the most relevant if your job might put you in a situation that will increase your chances of miscarrying.
In the end, every woman needs to do what is most comfortable for her. If that means waiting twelve weeks before revealing anything, then letting the first trimester pass is the best decision. If what’s most comfortable is announcing early, then that is what should be done. In either situation, the growing trend of baby reveal parties will give mothers plenty of time to revel in the happiness of their coming bundle of joy.
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