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in Parenting· Pregnancy

The Moms of COVID

The enhanced community quarantine (ECQ) implemented to help stop the spread of the Novel Coronavirus, popularly known as COVID-19, forced a majority of people to stay home in order to stay safe.  Unless a part of a company’s skeletal workforce, many had to shift to working from home, only going out when necessary for one of the listed essential needs. 

For an expectant mom, the situation is frightening, to say the least. Not only are hospitals hotbeds for acquiring the virus, but there is little conclusive research done on what the virus may do to an unborn child should the mother happen to contract COVID-19.  

Delivery, Recovery, and Woes

Sabrina

On the night she went into the delivery room, President Rodrigo Duterte announced that he was putting the island of Luzon under an ECQ or, as many have come to call it, a total lockdown. Sabrina Cristobal-Go and her husband were not sure what this meant. They understood from their doctor and hospital staff that there were COVID-19 positive patients in the hospital, but these patients were in another wing. Reminders to sanitise were heeded, but most of their anxiety was put aside by the excitement to finally meet their little bundle of joy.

It was after delivering a healthy baby that the quarantine and its realities slowly began to hit them. They were in a hospital with a virus that was actively wreaking havoc on the planet. They couldn’t stay there. Their doctors said as much. So Sabrina worked on her recovery–from a C-section no less–the day after delivery so as to be discharged as soon as possible. Knowing the dangers staying could bring to her and her baby, she pushed herself to walk and move. They stayed in the hospital a total of two days after delivery.

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Bea

Bea Gomez-Dey, who went through the last weeks of her pregnancy and delivered during the enhanced community quarantine, shares that it was an exercise in accepting both her independence and co-dependence, her strength and vulnerability.

Though Bea was relieved by the initial announcement of the ECQ–she felt it was a necessary step for everyone’s protection–she soon realised that complications it would bring to her life as a mother about to give birth. First, little is still known about COVID-19 and how it affects unborn children and newborn babies. Second, stricter hospital protocols meant that Bea would not have the type of delivery she wanted.

“I had an emotional day after receiving news that I had to labour and deliver alone,” Bea shares. “My husband wouldn’t be allowed with me.”

This was an exercise of strength for Bea even though she wanted to be vulnerable (which she describes as relying on her husband’s presence to be there at delivery). It was the kind of moment she knows she will have plenty of times now that she is a mother. The situation called on her to be strong, and she knew she had to rise to the challenge for herself and her child.

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Jinky

Just by watching the news, Jinky Boringot already knew a quarantine would be announced. Even before the president made an official announcement, her family had already stocked up on groceries and supplies. She was, also, already on house arrest on doctor’s orders. Not too worried about having to go out, she worried instead about delivery itself. 

She had four weeks to go, and frequent discussions with her doctor made it clear to her that she did not want to deliver in the pre-chosen hospital due to COVID cases and because of another fear she bore from experience. 

“I was more worried about my 3rd pregnancy because my second child had a Congenital Heart Defect, so I was concerned about our new baby also having some medical conditions. Plus the Covid 19 situations added to my existing anxieties,” she shared.

At the last minute, her OB GYN accommodated a change in hospital to one with no COVID cases, giving Jinky the ease and relaxation she needed for the delivery. “I realized that our family  has been through a lot with the operation and recovery of our 2nd child, and being positive and trusting God that everything will be okay helped us overcome that chapter in our life. So with the help of our family, especially my husband, I let go of all my worries with my 3rd pregnancy and just stayed positive… When the doctor told us that everything is okay  with our baby and that he is 100% healthy and has no medical conditions that I have to worry about, I was so relieved and happy.”

Home Life

Sabrina

Upon arrival at home, life with a newborn commenced. Sabrina’s husband became the designated family member to bear the quarantine pass, allowing him to leave the house to procure supplies. They limited the deliveries to the house so as to limit unnecessary contact. When grocery shopping, her husband buys in bulk, enough for three weeks. Also, they began a strict system of sanitation.

“Apart from him sanitizing as much as he can when goes out, he goes straight to the shower and disinfects again before he touches the baby. The groceries are sanitized too before entering our home,” Sabrina shares. “On the rare occasion that we have something delivered, we discard/sanitize the containers that it comes with.”

Other systems were also put in place, mainly to ensure that she and the baby are healthy. Sabrina stayed in touch with her OB-GYN and pediatrician through Viber, who were both responsive to all of Sabrina’s questions. The former taking the initiative to check on her scar as early as one week after delivery, and the latter was very prompt to answer all of her questions. “Technology is truly a HUGE help during these times,” Sabrina says.

Bea

Since her delivery, home life with her newborn has been “amazing,” as she describes it. Getting to know her little one has been a wonder for both her and her husband, and having her husband continually present is a blessing they might not have had without the quarantine. Luckily, Bea had already stocked up on a majority of baby supplies prior to the ECQ, and for the items she does not have, she relies on online stores. This preparedness made it easy for Bea and her husband to follow the quarantine protocols.

“We haven’t left the house with our baby yet. My husband follows a strict “protocol” when he comes back from errands outside of the home. We also practice meticulous cleaning and sanitation inside our home,” she says.

Jinky

“Right now, we are  just enjoying quality time with our kids and being extra busy taking care of our new baby,” said Jinky. An entrepreneur, who owns Zyji Enterprises, manufacturing and selling baby sheets, beddings, stroller pads, and toddler pillows, Jinky is quite used to home life. Now, with everyone home, she gets to spend time with all of her children together; her newborn, her eight-year-old, and her five-year-old.

“I hope that when they grow up and reminisce on this chapter of their lives, they will remember all the fun activities that we did at home, and not the feeling of being locked down because of a virus.”

Motherhood, CoronaVirus, and the Changing Times

Sabrina

While the initial fears experienced in the hospital have been allayed, new fears and anxieties have crept into Sabrina’s life with her new baby. She acknowledges that so much is unknown about what is to come, whether it be with the virus or the economy, and how it will affect their lives. 

“Balancing finances and resources is key during these times because of the uncertainty. We’re treading new waters and right now our main goal is preservation… Everything is so new, we are still learning from all of this. On the plus side, parents are at home with their children and spending so much quality time with each other. On the other side, rethinking our children’s means of education and the luxury of just being able to go to a certain place and be in contact with our other family and friends that live outside our home, the simple things that we were so used to before have to be approached so differently now. Right now, until a cure/treatment is in place, we all have to be germaphobes!”

Jinky

“Kids right now will remember how crucial it is to wash their hands,” said Jinky.  “As a mom, the Covid-19 virus has made me more vigilant when it comes to cleanliness and safety of my family.”

Recognising that the world is now face to face with a strange reality, one in which nothing is certain, Jinky is putting family and health above all else. She is also taking it as a chance to teach her children compassion and seeing the bright side of things despite challenges.

“The biggest challenge so far for us is how we can stay afloat financially in the midst of all these uncertainties. Our business has been closed ever since they announced the ECQ, and it was just recently that we were slow
ly getting back to our operations online. But since our production is still closed, we are not sure on how we can sustain the business if this situation will continue. But we are trying our best to look on the positive side of the situation as an opportunity for us to venture into new things and possibilities that can support our existing business, our employees and especially our family.” 

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Bea

Even with everything in its place and systems in check, however, Bea shares that the ECQ still brings some unexpected challenges. “Balancing household work (without a helper), work-from-home, and pregnancy pains take a toll on my emotional stability,” she shares. “Balancing many roles isnt easy – but it takes mindfulness and purposefulness to get it done. Taking breathing breaks, me-time and mindful exercises help me a lot.”

Bea’s yoga background undoubtedly helps with practicing mindfulness and purposefulness. She sees these uncertain times as a chance to shift and rethink the way we live. “It probably is true that we, mothers of COVID, will be more cautious and protective of our families and children. It is a fair reaction to the situation.”

However, she–perhaps coming from the experience of labour and delivery by herself and recalling her inner strength–sees this as an opportunity to create a better future. “From the little things (what we feed our children, how we consume resources), to our relationships (whose company we keep, what barriers and boundaries we have set), to more societal issues (our government, mother earth, the state of our nation). It feels as if we are at a tipping point and an opportunity to change for the better.”

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