When the new year comes around, some people take the time to map out the events of the next 12 months, and see how they can make things better. Some focus on their health, resolving to eat better and exercise with regularity to get in shape. Others focus on their work, developing a plan to grow their business or get promoted. And of course, there are the mothers who want to spend the year working at becoming better parents.
Here, real moms share their parenting resolutions for 2017.
“I’ve never been one to make New Year’s resolutions, much less about parenting, so this is a good exercise for me,” says Bubbles Salvador, mom of one.
“They say that you are a wife first, before a mother. I didn’t really believe that, and thought it was the other way around. So for almost eight years, I was hell-bent on being the best mom I could be, and in the process, forgot about the ‘wife’ part. I also thought that if I was a good mom, then being a good wife would naturally follow,” says Bubbles.
As part of Bubbles’ parenting resolutions, she says, “This year, I resolve to change that. My son is grown, and I feel he needs me to hover less, anyway. To be a better mom this year, I resolve to be a better wife. Be more attentive and less distracted. Be more generous with praises and be less critical. Be more demonstrative of my feelings and less inhibited. Give more than what I take. I hope to set an example of how a real and equal partnership works, and help shape my only child into a better human being.”
Gwen Jacinto Carino, mom of two, says, “Time flies and life is short. Our children, no matter how much we want them to never grow up (think Peter Pan), will do and in an instant, they will slowly break out from their cocoons and be the beautiful butterflies we wish for them to be. Because time is not always on our side, one thing I believe is important as a parent is to make real time for them. Pay more attention by leaving the gadgets behind and talking to them instead. This may sound simple but really, a lot of parents are guilty of this. Nothings beats a personal relationship with our children. It is essential in their upbringing and by adhering to this and also encouraging them to spend more personal time with family and friends, it will allow to make them build real, authentic relationships. Because one day we will just wonder, where has all that time gone?”
Teresa G. Valmonte, mom of three, lists down her parenting resolutions as such:
“I want to take care of myself more. I cannot take care of my family if I don’t take care of me.”
“I want to be in the present. I often think of what to do next, tomorrow, the week after, months down the road instead of being in the now.”
“I want to talk less and laugh more. It’s easy for me to do this with friends and colleagues but harder as a Mom. Although my kids think I’m funny, I think I can be more fun than just funny.”
“I want to improve our diet. I want them to eat more veggies but I myself am more of a carnivore.”
“I want to sleep more. I don’t sleep at the right time or enough. This affects my time with them, of course.”
As for Cay Salem Lim, mom of three, she says, “I hope to continue to carve out time for shared experiences one-on-one and as a family. Go out for ice cream or dinner with one child at a time for Mommy-and-me or Daddy-and-me dates. As a family, go on day trips, vacations, or family movie nights as much as we can. It is more important now than ever as my husband and I will be empty-nesters in four years.”
She adds, “I need to remember to keep on adjusting my parenting style to match my kids’ ages. I have gotten into conflicts with my teens in the past because I was “stuck” parenting them like they were still eight-year-olds. They are now 17, 15, and 13. Likewise, I will continue to expect them to act their age in terms of being more responsible about chores, expectations, and behavior. I will also remember to authentically praise my kids once a day through text, email, or in person.”